Me? Elitist? Naahhhhh........

The elitist music snob. A very unique breed indeed. Every once in a while, a music snob will get accused for disliking something simply because it's popular or mainstream. If I had a dime for every time someone has made such an accusation against me, I would've had enough money to go to V-Fest last weekend and Broken Social Scene presents Kevin Drew at the end of the month. Fact is, I like what I like because I like it. Get it? And I hate what I hate because I hate it. It's really that simple.

It's interesting that, since the words "hate" and "band" are both in the title of this blog, many people are forwarded here by googling expressions like "I hate Joanna Newsom." When they realize that I actually love Joanna Newsom, these people who have nothing better to do than scour the web for other people that hate their personally hated artists deem it necessary to unleash their evil and angry rants upon me. I find this highly amusing.

As far as the bands I hate, there are some bands that I could give you an alphabetized list of reasons why I hate them. I could also give you a long list of reasons why everybody else should really hate them too. But then there are also several artists that I dislike, but can really give no other reason for this other than personal preference. Recently, a friend mentioned to me that he hated The Jayhawks. When I asked him why, he replied, "Because they suck." Well, I've seen them perform and they clearly do not suck. They may not be your cup of meat, but to say they suck would imply that they lack talent in their musical field, and all the evidence points to the contrary. As a personal example, I really don't care for Bruce Springsteen. I personally find it hard to get past his voice. Mary Hart is to Kramer, as Springsteen is to me. That having been said however, I would never be so dense so as to say that he stinks, simply because I don't like him. His contribution to music is undeniable, and he's inspired and touched many of the artists that I personally enjoy (such as Ryan Adams, Elvis Costello and Bright Eyes.) His voice just gives me a rash, that's all.

So does that exclude me from the tag of prototypical elitist music snob? Don't know. Don't particularly care, to be honest. But although this blog is labeled as being both arrogant and pretentious, you will never hear me say that an artist stinks or that he is terrible without some form of justifiable reasoning. (You will also never HEAR me say that, because this is a visual blog, not an audio blog. My choice of wording sometimes....now there's something to rant about!) You will however, see, from time to time, that I do very strongly dislike several artists. Remember, that there is a huge difference between saying "such and such is garbage" as opposed to "I don't like such and such." I am opinionated, there's no doubt about that. But what I write here is strictly that ... an opinion. I never claim to actually know what I'm talking about.

Music Snobs and Their Opinions

musicsnob
Originally uploaded by pulp.

What is it with music snobs and their opinions? Generally speaking, we are easily some of the most opinionated people around. However, we're a strange breed when it comes to giving our opinion to someone who asks for it. This, we find incredibly difficult. When you DON'T ask for it, rants and raves come pouring out of our nostrils. Ask for our opinion however, and we become completely dumbstruck.

For example, if you tell me that Nicklelback is the greatest band in Canadian music history, I find it impossible to contain myself. I go into cardiac arrest. Smoke starts to billow out of my ears. A lump forms around the ankle area and eventually pushes up, through my veins, until it reaches my mouth and I verbally explode with a flurry of how could you possibly's and don't you realize's! These are battle conditions and a true music snob cannot contain himself when confronted with such a diametrically opposed idea.

On the other hand, simply ask me for a recommendation. My usually articulate tongue becomes positively mute. All of a sudden, this has become the most arduous question I have ever heard. My friend and fellow music snob works at a local record store which is where you would think that the 'recommendation question' would eventually become second nature to him. He says that it stumps him every time. A reader of this blog asked me the other day if there were any good concerts coming to the city this summer. I broke out in a sweat. I had trouble sleeping. How could I possibly be expected to answer such a demanding question? I mean, I only attend about 4572 concerts a year. How does that make me the go-to guy?

And therein lies the secret, my non-rock snob friends. If you are constantly bombarded by the incessant ramblings of the pretentious and arrogant alien beings from the planet Rocksnobbery, than simply ask them, "Well what do you recommend?" Not to give away our secrets, but it will shut us up every time.

Disclaimer: To the one who asked me about good concerts this year, I didn't actually lose sleep over that question. I tend to exaggerate for the sake of creating an interesting article. Keep reading my blog and asking me questions. And yes, I HATE Nickelback, but people who love Nickelback haven't actually given me any life-threatening medical condition. I'm not dying or anything. I just need a nap.

Thr above picture was found on pulp's flickr page which can be found here.