Thursday, May 10, 2007

Music Snobs and Their Opinions


musicsnob
Originally uploaded by pulp.
What is it with music snobs and their opinions? Generally speaking, we are easily some of the most opinionated people around. However, we're a strange breed when it comes to giving our opinion to someone who asks for it. This, we find incredibly difficult. When you DON'T ask for it, rants and raves come pouring out of our nostrils. Ask for our opinion however, and we become completely dumbstruck.

For example, if you tell me that Nicklelback is the greatest band in Canadian music history, I find it impossible to contain myself. I go into cardiac arrest. Smoke starts to billow out of my ears. A lump forms around the ankle area and eventually pushes up, through my veins, until it reaches my mouth and I verbally explode with a flurry of how could you possibly's and don't you realize's! These are battle conditions and a true music snob cannot contain himself when confronted with such a diametrically opposed idea.

On the other hand, simply ask me for a recommendation. My usually articulate tongue becomes positively mute. All of a sudden, this has become the most arduous question I have ever heard. My friend and fellow music snob works at a local record store which is where you would think that the 'recommendation question' would eventually become second nature to him. He says that it stumps him every time. A reader of this blog asked me the other day if there were any good concerts coming to the city this summer. I broke out in a sweat. I had trouble sleeping. How could I possibly be expected to answer such a demanding question? I mean, I only attend about 4572 concerts a year. How does that make me the go-to guy?

And therein lies the secret, my non-rock snob friends. If you are constantly bombarded by the incessant ramblings of the pretentious and arrogant alien beings from the planet Rocksnobbery, than simply ask them, "Well what do you recommend?" Not to give away our secrets, but it will shut us up every time.

Disclaimer: To the one who asked me about good concerts this year, I didn't actually lose sleep over that question. I tend to exaggerate for the sake of creating an interesting article. Keep reading my blog and asking me questions. And yes, I HATE Nickelback, but people who love Nickelback haven't actually given me any life-threatening medical condition. I'm not dying or anything. I just need a nap.

Thr above picture was found on pulp's flickr page which can be found here.

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